Solace!

Blessed wiv betrayels,
a soul keeps groaning,
remembering the deceased past,
& those excruciating moments,
which now restrict my further movements!

I behave as neurotic,
just because I'm embarrassed,
I was made to loose my dignity,
left alone wiv several question marks,
nobody listened & I got those remarks!

I never got a buffer for my cure,
should I now rely? , I'm not sure,
It's my fear who again & again,
restrict me from feeling you,
may b you'r also in that same queue!

but your touch is oxygenative,
pulling out that introvert of mine,
I regain my emotional balance,
you call me outta the oblivion,
& put me in the state of relaxation!

you whisper something strange,
something I'd never felt before,
may be because I wasn't asked to do so,
but you put up a reliable statement,
yes! your arrival relates my improvement!

Being a solace for me,
you directed me towards life,
Please! don't ever ever break this chain,
I need the confirmation of your stay,
promise me that you'll never go away!

Black!

This dark remains forever,

I end up whining as everything is over,

seeing myself chained in death,

I beg the wind but it was silent,

heard a cloud's call and i turned violent!

This dream hurdled the light inside,

I see my shadow was about to collide,

keeping it secret I stood still,

Now I'm turning into ashes,

let my existence prove no matches!

I also tried a random choice,

but My luck mixed some noise,

left with immense negation,

I'm the worst lable of humanity,

But I was awarded a divine clearity!

I'm mere cipher with no good feelings at all,

filled with rancour and evil's call,

denying any clue of goodness,

because I don't wanna be an easy Prey,

So I'm flying this pure and Black way!

I'm the uncrowned nature's boy,

my acts may resemble a coy,

but let the horn blow, you are warned,

a gate to hell I may show,

wishing goodbye to one of my foe!

Eternal Thoughts!

Here I sit another night alone filled with total sadness. Trying to fight back the tears that don't seem to want an end.
I lie down and try to close my eyes, but all I can picture is your face. The sweet face of an angel that hurt me so deeply. I can picture your soft voice saying I LOVE YOU, Good Night & Sweet Dreams. Your soft cheeks getting enlarged when you smile. Every thing reminds me of you. I look from room to room & hope I'll see you there. When I hear the door I look in anticiaption waiting for you to enter & give me a hug letting me know you care for me. My life is so empty filled with sadness & gloom in a room once that was thought to be lit by you. I can't stop this crying. I'm just hurting so bad. I really don't care about living anymore & wish I was dead. I pray to the lord when I lie down my head, please come & take me away from his pain, for I never want to feel it again. You never cared about my feelings, not even looked at me with eyes filled with affection. It was me who always said I LOVE YOU like a fool. I'm torn all apart inside & out, I'm sad & lonely & wish I was dead. I stopped taking my meds & why should I care when it was so easy for you to let go. I didn't even see you shed a tear it seemed as thou you didn't even care. I can't sleep really sometimes may be an hour or two. This is all because I LOVE YOU. Others tell me I'll heal, but never really I'll. It's not easy to forget you & to hold will. It's not easy to forget you & to hold bak my tears. I'm giving on my life now. I don't even care about living anymore. I'm sad & lonely & wish I was dead. I can't see how could you just let go. Not even a feeling in deep within your heart & soul. I put on a front when others are around, But actually I'm dead & under the ground. I've been getting this tight squeeze deep in my chest, pain in my arm & into my neck, My jaw feels like it was hit with a hammer. I know soon the almighty will tell me to lie down & rest, for he will send his angels to come & get me & take all my pain away. The pain that you caused when you ignored me that day & pain in my heart that is slowly drifting away. The breath that I'm taking are getting slower & few, And I can feel my body wreaking as i remind the picture of you. Soon I'll stop writing & lie down my head, I can feel my body getting weaker, I may soon be dead. Others told me to call a doctor when I started to feel this way, but the thought of living without you another day makes me just want to let go & fade away. But don't get me wrong, If I should close my eyes & die. The hurt that you have gifted me, I'll always carry through my eternity. Ok I must lie down no. I'm feeling weaker & weak, I just want to leave you with my final thoughts & they are as follows:
I opened up my heart to you & let you in. I never thought of your nature & likes. I just loved you for your simplicity & angel eyes, but you didn't care. You ignored me hated me as I'm a piece of crap. So saying you a heartly good bye I'm winding.

Have a happy life:)